Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Oops, I did it again!

The law firm where I am working this summer is not the kind of place where one usually has to watch one's step. There are some hierarchies, sure, and some egos to contend with, but for the most part, it's pretty laid back. This afternoon, however, I made a rather large faux pas.

Earlier this morning, I was informed by a conscientious demanding partner that he would not be giving my final draft of a brief any further attention before filing it. (I am pretty sure that's a non-delegable duty, but it's none of my business if he gets disbarred.) I was thus doing my very best not to fuck up and spent the entire damn day proofreading, blue booking, and otherwise attempting to make it as perfect as possible. At 6:30, I was sensing the end of the torture, flexing my facial muscles in preparation for my first smile in hours when a name partner sidled up to me, ignoring the fact that I was on the phone, and sang out, "How'd you like to do a little research for me?" I was faced with a conundrum. How ever should I reply? Do I:

A) Tell the truth - "No, you fucking cocksucker, I would not like to do a little research for you. I've been blue booking for nine hours and I am extremely dangerous right now, and moreover, I should suggest that you back away slowly and pretend this little incident never happened."
B) Totally lie, instantly hanging up the phone without so much as a goodbye - "Sure! Sounds great!"
C) Somewhere in between - ask my boyfriend to hold, and ask the name partner if I can start it tomorrow before accepting the assignment.

Well, obviously, I did not go with choice A since I'm not suicidal. Nor did I have it in me to go with B. So I went with C. I let my big, honest mouth run free and of course it got me in trouble. I asked "Can I start it tomorrow or do I need to do it tonight?" He visibly recoiled. In his entire career as a partner, he's probably never had some uppity summer look at him and hedge when he tries to give an assignment. I knew I had fucked up. I tried to cover by hanging up on my boyfriend and following him meekly to his office with my legal pad, trying to muster up some enthusiasm. The enthusiasm seemed contrived though, and after writing down the assignment, he banished me from his office with a disdainful hand wave.

Here's the thing: I just don't care. These bastards are not giving me a job next year. I have known that since I interviewed. It's not personal; it's just a smaller firm that doesn't have the capacity. It's possible that they won't even hire me part-time during next semester. So seriously - fuck it. I have two and a half weeks left there, and at that point, I think I may just spend my sweet, sweet free time volunteering at a pet shelter or a hospital holding babies and otherwise reclaiming my soul from the evil law industry. So HA!


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